Most families have what some call "the black sheep in the family." The black sheep is the misfit, the one that didn't measure up, the one most of the family finds embarrassing, and the one we wish we could hide.
Our family had two -- one, a cousin of mine, and the other, an uncle. When you grow up with this, the stories and the judgments are pretty much engrained. A person doesn't really stand a fighting chance of overcoming the stigma that has been attached to them. It's only later in life that you sometimes gain a certain amount of impartiality -- enough to wonder what it would be like if you started over with that person, without the benefit of any history.
Today, I found out some new stories and another perspective on my uncle, whom I was led to believe was a pathological liar. Another more distant family member on his side weighed in with another perspective.
According to him, my uncle was a great storyteller. His stories were part truth, part embellishment, and part fabrication, and yet you would expect all these things from a budding novelist, which is what he was, among other things he was pursuing. It made me wonder what I would think of my uncle today if I were meeting him for the first time. We would have been able to connect as novelists, at the least. Hearing talk about my uncle made me want to see him again, but of course that would be impossible since he has passed away a number of years ago. But it made me wonder if there are others in my life that I have prejudged on my own.
"Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait til the Lord comes." (1 Corinthians 4:5) It's hard to do this with people who come with a history. We need to learn not to believe everything someone says about someone else. (Actually we should pay very little attention to such a thing, since that usually amounts to nothing but gossip.) We need to find out for ourselves.
I got this story from my friend, Marilyn ~ I posted 'cause I can relate. My parents have been gone for quite some time. They are painted in various colors. My parents were wonderful people with flaws, just like the rest of us! ~wink~
thou at times my heart would break...
♪♪ there's a purpose in every change He makes ~ God makes no mistakes ♪♪
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1 comment:
Do you miss the NB fall, Kim? The colors are just starting here. The days a sunny and wonderful... right now. Last Sat we had to cancel, or rather postpone, our church picnic at the farm because it poured! We are hoping for this Sat. It will be a beautiful drive there. Wish you could come!
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